I refuse to allow spaces that reject the rights of women to feel safe.

And that is why I will never attend PAX again.

I haven’t attended PAX on my own dime since the first year it was at the Washington State Convention Center, but I attended the year that the Dickwolves shirts first were worn at PAX – and they terrified me.

Because that was a way to know that there were people in the building who thought it was OK to make jokes at my expense. People who seemed to think my dignity being destroyed was utterly hilarious.

People who believed trigger warnings were hilarious.

As of yesterday, Gabe has solidified my choice to never attend PAX again – and I encourage all of you who support me, and fellow survivors of sexual assault & violence to do the same.

Gabe thinks it is OK to make fun of rape survivors. He thinks it’s OK to treat PTSD as a joke. He thinks it is OK to bully transpeople.

It makes me sad, because PAX has always been fantastic with disability support, a cause we all know I’m quite fond of. But I can’t balance that against my psychological safety.

My sanity, and the sanity of other women is more important.

Gabe needs to be removed. But that’s going to be a tricky situation for everyone, because how do you remove the face of a con when the con is based on their artistic endeavours?

You can’t.

And when there is someone like Gabe at the helm of such an organization, well, it creates a culture that I fear.

Men cheered when Gabe said he regretted pulling the Dickwolves merchandise.

I don’t want to be in a room like that. I never want to subject myself to a room like that again.

THAT culture is exactly why I don’t like going to cons. So I will search for a con where all my friends will be, maybe it’ll be GenCon, maybe it’ll be Geek Girl Con.

But never again, PAX. Not until you respect my safety, and the safety of others, above Gabe’s feelings.

Don’t give them your money. Don’t give them your time. Play games, write games, have fun, and CREATE CHANGE. But right now, we can’t change from within, so we have to find a new course.